Christmas Parties and Anonymous Cities

Hmm, ok, so I know it's been awhile since I posted. I've been both busy and lazy, so those are my handy excuses :D

I'm settling in at work, sort of, and the office Christmas party was last night...it was a very nice affair! I can't recall if I blogged about the cocktail party I went to last month that was for a children's charity...I'm too lazy to go look, so I'll tell you now, forgive me if I'm repeating myself :P It was billed, in two different places, as formal/black tie. So I went, I will shamelessly admit, in large part because it was an excuse to get dressed up, which I love to do. But when I got there, no one was dressed up!! Ugh. I met a girl last week who'd also been there, dressed up, and we shared our annoyance...though it seems we arrived at the party at different times. Mercifully, my coat hid my attire and I promptly left. But I was very excited to hear that the office Christmas party was formal and, after telling my cocktail party story to a few colleagues, I was assured that the office party really was formal. We all changed at work and the frenzy to get cute was rather amusing, but most importantly, I got to make use of the dress I bought for that stupid cocktail party! So yay.

Today was a lazy day of afternoon tea with some friends and vegging, this whole work thing is exhausting, I needed a break ;)

I have done absolutely no Christmas shopping, though I've done much Christmas partying ;) And in very happy news, I recently came to a realisation that means I now have New Year's Eve plans, whereas I previously had grand plans of a delicious meal by myself and watching the fireworks on TV.

Since moving here, I had a rule for myself that I would not spend NYE in the states, on mere principle. The logistics didn't really register at the time, but with the day falling on a weekday this year, it was actually out of my control, I have to work that day just like everyone else...so I'll be in London and will abide by my rule ;) But I realised not too long ago that the day was creeping up, I had no plans and that most likely, everyone else already did.

I didn't want to be "that loser" who made it known that I had no life ;) So, I had a good pathetic little cry over it and then lamented my sad tale to a net friend the next day, far more philosophical and fine with it by then. But he pointed out that I can still get away with the "new in town" excuse and not look like a loser for fishing for plans.

Sooo, whilst out with a group of friends this past week, I mentioned my lack of plans, purposely adding that whole "it's so weird to be new in town." And, lo and behold, others were gleeful that someone else didn't have plans and was admitting it. 5 days later, I've gotten braver, I've said it to others and I now have the daunting task of finding something for the 6 (and growing) group of us to do.

Which brings me to a point. London is, just like any major city, cold and anonymous. There's the unwritten rule that you don't talk to other people on the tube because only crazy people talk to strangers, the fact that though I have seen my next door neighbour several times and have exchanged smiles with her, neither of us has introduced ourselves, and then there was pickpocket night...where no one batted an eye or tried to help when all my worldly possessions were no longer my possessions. But without fail, when I comment on these rules of society to others, I'm met with a knowing yet frustrated smile and we joke about how you don't dare defy the culture, but it drives you mad.

Those jokes lead to talks about making friends in this big cold city...and everyone agrees that it takes a ton of work, it's nearly impossible, etc. Suddenly, there's no shame in admitting that you lack friends ;) If everyone's in the same boat, then it's not weird or pathetic to have a less-than-packed social calendar, it's reality.

I ran into a girl I know tonight at the drug store, whilst I was procuring drugs for a sinus infection that just won't die, and we said hi, but went our separate ways. I realised a few minutes too late that I should have asked if she had dinner plans, because I didn't and though I was actually quite happy to veg on this particular evening, I also should have seized the opportunity to make a friend...but oh well.

The point I've meandered to is this: I've made friends here in jolly old London, but friendships take effort and work...and having to exert that effort doesn't make me desperate for friends, it makes me just like most other Londoners...trying to find a few friends in a sea of anonymity.